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October 14 2011
Faulty Perceptions [by Unknown]
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Tags:
psychology knowthyself
September 22 2011
Partial Objects -- Who are the important characters in Star Wars?
'Most stories have a Macguffin (or two) but you want to make sure your life doesn’t use them: something you pursue, or which motivates you, drives you, that, after all, turns out to be pretty meaningless.'The Narcissist's Addiction to Fame and Celebrity by Dr. Sam Vaknin
'As far as their fans are concerned, celebrities fulfil two emotional functions: they provide a mythical narrative (a story that the fan can follow and identify with) and they function as blank screens onto which the fans project their dreams, hopes, fears, plans, values, and desires (wish fulfilment). The slightest deviation from these prescribed roles provokes enormous rage and makes us want to punish (humiliate) the "deviant" celebrities. But why? When the human foibles, vulnerabilities, and frailties of a celebrity are revealed, the fan feels humiliated, "cheated", hopeless, and "empty". To reassert his self-worth, the fan must establish his or her moral superiority over the erring and "sinful" celebrity. The fan must "teach the celebrity a lesson" and show the celebrity "who's boss". It is a primitive defense mechanism – narcissistic grandiosity. It puts the fan on equal footing with the exposed and "naked" celebrity.'September 10 2011
NYTimes.com -- Do You Suffer From Decision Fatigue?
'Decision fatigue helps explain why ordinarily sensible people get angry at colleagues and families, splurge on clothes, buy junk food at the supermarket and can’t resist the dealer’s offer to rustproof their new car. No matter how rational and high-minded you try to be, you can’t make decision after decision without paying a biological price. It’s different from ordinary physical fatigue — you’re not consciously aware of being tired — but you’re low on mental energy. The more choices you make throughout the day, the harder each one becomes for your brain, and eventually it looks for shortcuts, usually in either of two very different ways. One shortcut is to become reckless: to act impulsively instead of expending the energy to first think through the consequences. The other shortcut is the ultimate energy saver: do nothing. To compromise is a complex human ability and therefore one of the first to decline when willpower is depleted.'Sue Gerhardt: Cradle of civilisation: In order to develop a 'social brain', babies need loving one-to-one care
'...the attention that we receive as babies impacts on our brain structures. Babies rely on their carers to soothe distress and restore equilibrium. -- ...children who lived with a depressed parent in infancy are more reactive to stress later in life; children who lived with a depressed parent later in childhood showed no such effect. This makes sense if we remember that the stress response is probably being "set" like a thermostat very early in life. It also makes sense in evolutionary terms to have newborn brains which are unfinished, because they can be adapted to fit the needs of the social group. In effect, they can be programmed to behave in ways that suit their community. However, it is a risky strategy. In a harsh environment, a baby's cries may be ignored, or he may be punished for being distressed. This is likely to produce an individual who becomes, in his turn, relatively insensitive and prone to aggression – and this could be useful in a tense, hostile community.'Telegraph -- Scientists find they can control how people react to group pressure
'Volunteers whose posterior medial frontal cortex, an area in the middle of the brain that is associated with reward processing, were exposed to the magnetic pulses suffered reduced levels of conformity. The researchers believe this part of the brain dates back a long way in the evolution of animals and is responsible or automatically "correcting" our performance when we fall out of line with a group. They say that by suspending this mechanism, it allows people to think and behave differently. They now believe it may be possible to develop drugs or behaviour changing techniques that could increase or decrease people's conformity. "Right now we can search for behavioural techniques that modulate activity of the posterior medial frontal cortex without any physical intervention. Hopefully, with help of these techniques someone would be able to partly immune themselves to 'group pressure'." -- Monkey see; Monkey wear pulsating tinfoil hat.August 31 2011
Amazon -- Presence: How to Use Positive Energy for Success in Every Situation by Patsy Rodenburg
From the book: 'A baby cries out. It is frightened, hungry, dirty or cold. The baby wants comfort, a parent and some human contact, an adult's strength, power and protection. The initial call is in Second Circle and expects and deserves a Second Circle response. If there is no response the cry will get more distraught and desperate, and will move into Third Circle. If there is still no response, the baby will withdraw into a detached First Circle. A genuine cry should have a genuine response. Is that too much to ask? The parent won't become the baby's slave, which is the parent's fear. Actually, the unanswered call will eventually come back to haunt parents and society. If appropriately answered, the baby will stop crying out, knowing they will be answered. In this way they develop confidence and self-esteem which allow them to stay present to and in the world. Confidence is a manifestation of entitlement and entitlement starts with the answered call.'Wikipedia -- Attachment in adults: Affect regulation
'...when people experience anxiety, they try to reduce their anxiety by seeking closeness with relationship partners. The third strategy is called the hyperactivation, or anxiety attachment, strategy. Something provokes anxiety in a person, who then tries to reduce anxiety by seeking physical or psychological closeness to a partner. The partner rebuffs the request for greater closeness. The lack of responsiveness increases feelings of insecurity and anxiety. The person then gets locked into a cycle with the partner: the person tries to get closer, the partner rejects the request for greater closesness, which leads the person to try even harder to get closer, followed by another rejection from the partner, and so on. The cycle ends only when the situation shifts to a security-based strategy (because the partner finally responds positively) or when the person switches to an attachment avoidant strategy (because the person gives up on getting a positive response from the partner).'Wikipedia -- Attachment in adults
'Insecure attachment: Anxious–preoccupied attachment: People who are anxious or preoccupied with attachment tend to agree with the following statements: "I want to be completely emotionally intimate with others, but I often find that others are reluctant to get as close as I would like. I am uncomfortable being without close relationships, but I sometimes worry that others don't value me as much as I value them." People with this style of attachment seek high levels of intimacy, approval, and responsiveness from their partners. They sometimes value intimacy to such an extent that they become overly dependent on their partners – a condition colloquially termed clinginess. Compared to securely attached people, people who are anxious or preoccupied with attachment tend to have less positive views about themselves. They often doubt their worth as a partner and blame themselves for their partners' lack of responsiveness.'Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment: How It Can Help You Find – And Keep – Love by Amir Levine and Rachel S.F. Heller
From the book: 'When Attachment Styles Clash: The Anxious-Avoidant Trap: Conflict is often left unresolved because the resolution itself creates too much intimacy. If you are anxious or secure, you genuinely want to work out a relationship problem. However, the resolution itself often brings a couple closer together – this is a scenario that, however unconsciously, the avoidant partner wants to avoid. While people with an anxious or secure attachment style seek to resolve a disagreement to achieve greater emotional closeness, this outcome is uncomfortable for the avoidant who actually seeks to remain distant. In order to dodge the possibility of getting closer, avoidants tend to grow more hostile and distant as arguments progress. Unless there is recognition of the process involved in an anxious-avoidant conflict, the distancing during conflict tends to repeat itself and causes a lot of unhappiness. Without addressing the issue, the situation can go from bad to worse.'August 30 2011
YouTube -- Freedomain Radio: The Facts About Spanking
'The shocking science about the long-term effects of corporal punishment, essential viewing for every parent.' -- "Changing from how you were parented to how you are parenting is one of the most difficult – and essential – things in the world."
'The shocking science about the long-term effects of corporal punishment, essential viewing for every parent.' -- "Changing from how you were parented to how you are parenting is one of the most difficult – and essential – things in the world."
August 18 2011
YouTube -- The Psychology Of The Dark Knight: Batman Unmasked
'Batman Begins and The Dark Knight are both excellent sources of entertainment, but they also offer a complex and interesting dissection of a man who learned to use his own fear against criminals.' -- "Kids generally – even if they're not directly responsible for some terrible event – personalize the event and take responsibility for it." -- "...Bruce Wayne is the mask."
'Batman Begins and The Dark Knight are both excellent sources of entertainment, but they also offer a complex and interesting dissection of a man who learned to use his own fear against criminals.' -- "Kids generally – even if they're not directly responsible for some terrible event – personalize the event and take responsibility for it." -- "...Bruce Wayne is the mask."
August 11 2011
Wikipedia -- Attachment theory
'Early experiences with caregivers gradually give rise to a system of thoughts, memories, beliefs, expectations, emotions, and behaviours about the self and others. This system, called the "internal working model of social relationships", continues to develop with time and experience. Internal models regulate, interpret and predict attachment-related behaviour in the self and the attachment figure. As they develop in line with environmental and developmental changes, they incorporate the capacity to reflect and communicate about past and future attachment relationships. They enable the child to handle new types of social interactions; knowing, for example, that an infant should be treated differently from an older child, or that interactions with teachers and parents share characteristics. This internal working model continues to develop through adulthood, helping cope with friendships, marriage and parenthood, all of which involve different behaviours and feelings.'Becoming Attached by Robert Karen (1990) (PDF)
'The struggle to understand the infant-mother bond ranks as one of the great quests of modern psychology – one that touches us deeply, because it holds so many clues to how we became who we are. What do children need, at a minimum, in order to feel that the world of people is a positive place and that they themselves have value? What experiences in infancy will enable them to feel confident enough to explore, to develop healthy peer relations, to rebound from adversity? What custody or foster-care arrangements will best serve their emotional needs if the family should dissolve, and at what point do we decide that a neglectful or abusive mother is worse than a kind stranger? Which of us are at risk of being parents who will raise insecure children, and what can be done to minimize that risk? These are all questions of huge theoretical and practical interest.'BBC -- UK riots: What turns people into looters?
'...looting makes "powerless people suddenly feel powerful" and that is "very intoxicating". The world has been turned upside down. The youngsters are used to adults in authority telling them they cannot do this or this will happen. Then they do it and nothing happens." Numbers are all important in a riot... "You cannot riot on your own. A one-man riot is a tantrum. At some point the bigger crowds confronting the police realise that they are in control." They are swept away by the crowd... they take on the values of the group. [Their] own internal values and norms become less salient. ...it suggests it's normal. "Humans are the best on the planet at imitating. And we tend to imitate what is successful." "It boils down to the buzz. It's an excitement. You can't take away that thrill – the roar of the crowd. That sense of a group of men, something's happening." ...most of the rioters are from poor estates who have no "stake in conformity", who have nothing to lose. "They are not 'us'."'August 07 2011
Wikipedia -- Carl Rogers
On Becoming a Person: Dealing with Breakdowns in Communication: Real communication occurs, and [the] evaluative tendency is avoided, when we listen with understanding. What does that mean? It would simply mean that before presenting your own point of view, it would be necessary for you to achieve the other speaker's frame of reference – to understand his thoughts and feelings so well that you could summarize them for him. Sounds simple, doesn't it? But if you try it you will discover it is one of the most difficult things you have ever tried to do. ...courage is required. If you really understand another person in this way, if you are willing to enter his private world and see the way life appears to him, without any attempt to make evaluative judgments, you run the risk of being changed yourself. You might see it his way, you might find yourself influenced in your attitudes or your personality. This risk of being changed is one of the most frightening prospects most of us can face.July 24 2011
The Last Psychiatrist -- Crazy
'From McKee: "Story begins when an event, either by human decision or accident in the universe, radically upsets the balance of forces in the protagonist's life, arousing in that character the need to restore the balance of life. To do so, that character will conceive of an "Object of Desire," that which they [believe] they need to put life back into balance. They will then go off into their world, into themselves, in the various dimensions of their existence, seeking that Object of Desire ... and they will struggle against forces of antagonism that will come from their own inner natures as human beings, their relationships with other human beings, their personal and/or social life, and the physical environment itself. They may or may not achieve that Object of Desire; they may or may not finally be able to restore their life to a satisfying balance." -- Everything that happens in your life is digested by you through this process, so it would be worth your time to memorize it.'July 11 2011
Why Love Matters: How Affection Shapes a Baby's Brain by Sue Gerhardt
'The attempt to escape from feelings has its origins in a babyhood in which the baby's feelings have not been identified and responded to in a contingent way. You can only change emotional processing by doing it differently. When a particular feeling is aroused, neurotransmitters are released from the subcortex and old neural networks automatically become activated to manage this state of arousal in the old way. If your therapist accepts your feelings, they do not have to be denied by the neural network which would normally do that, or acted upon by the neural network that would normally respond in that way. The therapist's acceptance allows a mental space to reflect on the feelings and consider how to respond afresh. Whilst the feelings are alive and active, so too are the stress hormones which will assist new (higher brain) cortisol synapses to be made in response to the sub-cortical signals. Together with the therapist, new networks can be developed.'July 07 2011
Body Pleasure and the Origins of Violence by James W. Prescott
'The reciprocal relationship of pleasure and violence is highly significant because certain sensory experiences during the formative periods of development will create a neuropsychological predisposition for either violence-seeking or pleasure-seeking behaviors later in life. -- Physically affectionate human societies are highly unlikely to be physically violent. -- ...deprivation of body pleasure throughout life—but particularly during the formative periods of infancy, childhood, and adolescence—are very closely related to the amount of warfare and interpersonal violence. -- If violence is high, pleasure is low, and conversely, if pleasure is high, violence is low. -- If we accept the theory that the lack of sufficient somatosensory pleasure is a principal cause of violence, we can work toward promoting pleasure and encouraging affectionate interpersonal relationships as a means of combatting aggression.'June 28 2011
The Last Psychiatrist -- Is The Cult Of Self-Esteem Ruining Our Kids?
'They didn't rush because the kid can't handle pain, but because they can't tolerate the kid's pain.' -- 'I know this is going to run me afoul of every comfy-chair therapist in America, but there is no reason to write anything down, ever. You're not a detective, you're not looking for inconsistencies or lost time, the patient is there for answers and the structure of your relationship is itself the answers. We can discuss good and bad technique later; the point here is to establish that these two people are creating "environments" that are safe for themselves. It may also be safe for the patient, it may be labeled as "for the patient" but I hope it is evident that the real impetus is the comfort of the therapist. With me so far? Ok: that's also how they parent.'
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